my new favorite thing....Chocolate Plum sweets, which is a piece of prune covered with chocolate. sounds crazy and gross, but quite tasty. note- do not let your dog get ahold of these.

i really don't know how this stuff happens

So my little nephew came to visit me at Easter.
I my mind he's little, around 5 years old with a clean face and a monogrammed sweater.
As you can see from the picture, he's not so little anymore.
He tells me he's 27 years old. Which is totally weird, because that's what I am.
I wait for my boys to get bigger, for a time when they will toilet and clean themselves. I think I will then have the time to spend on the things I love. And then I realize, they are the things I love.
I have a lump in my chest everyday with my little 2 year-old, I can't reign him in. He is a wild man. I fear going anywhere with him, because of the destruction he leaves in his path.
Today I had a glimmer of what life may be for him. He seemed to understand me. We went to some physical therapy, lunch at Chick-fil-A and then Costco. A sweet little boy that held my hand in the parking lot, only dropping his body limp twice to see if I would catch him so he could dangle by one arm. I caught him every time.

you will enjoy this or else

because i was having an "aren't I a great mama" day, i took the idea from IHOP and made a Dr. Suess dinner: green eggs, ham and who cakes. as you can see, the joy on the children's faces just makes me wheeze with glee. i'm reminded of the three monkeys see no evil, hear no evil, and speak no evil.

what happens when dad is in charge....

couch to 5k

So I'm trying to run. Actually, I think the right word is "jog" since it is a pace just above a walk.
A small group of us decided to do the "Race for the Cure" in May, and my friend emailed me the plan that was going to get us there...."From Couch to 5K."
Ironically that night a friend of mine from Japan called and by coincidence started telling me about a crazy thing she did called the "couch to 5K" running plan.
It is in the cards. When we worked together about 15 years ago, she was not someone who enjoyed being warm, let alone would put herself through the treachery of exercise. She encouraged me saying if she could do it so could I.
So I am about half way through it, though I am not looking forward to my new week.

alpha diva psycho nazi mom

Believe it or not I had to edit myself in my own blog for being too hard on the alpha-moms that surround me.

God Bless em; they are a kind and thoughtful crew. But I am reminded why it is best they stay on their side of the carpool lane.

I helped out at a teachers' appreciation luncheon, where I was told what to wear, when to refill drinks and reminded why I haven't chosen a career in the food service industry.

I thought dishwasher suited me best so I tried to say in the background as much as possible. But when I had to walk into the hall to fetch something. The Alpha-mom walked past me and stage-whispered, "You have a towel on your shoulder!"

Oh the horror.

I am the baby apraxia whisperer. Kenji is saying more and more things. The problem, no one knows what the hell he's saying. Except me. And granted I only get him about 5% of the time.

deh-deh-deh OHN -- "telephone"

neh-neh neh neh -wiggles -- "playplace of anysort, dancing, colors....or the wiggles"

One of the weekly places I shuttle the little guy around to, in hopes it will trigger him to speak is the YMCA. We've been going in the pool.

His first time in the pool was a huge success. He "talked" more in his first 1/2 hour in the pool than he does all day.

He will do anything that involves water. In fact in the picture above he had just finished a bath, was freshly dried, diapered and clothed, when he decided to get back in.

(I must mention that because of the drought. We save water as much as we can from the tub and shower to do things like flush toilets, water plants or dump into the washing machine.)

I no longer save tub water.

acupuncture

So I've started going to an acupuncturist...
I'm drinking strange teas made of roots, bark and seeds.
I'm swallowing little pellets made of ingredients that I had to Google. Wouldn't "Semen Persicae" scare you too?
I've got a bum back and basically my chi is off.
They've put suction cups on my back leaving big circle hickeys and burnt things small bits of things on me.
Have I mentioned that I am turning 40?
I am requiring more and more maintenance...

ode to a lunch

"we are early," mom declares.
there must be a reason.

always very early
or very late.

never on time.

"where's my lunch?" a kid shouts.
it is not in the bag.

always peanut butter
or salami.

never changing.

"hang on boys," mama whoops.
we are off to QT.

all-beef jerky, a dill pickle
or krispy kreme.

mother of the year...
maybe next year.

being great in 2008

This is the year that I turn 40.

I think in the new year I should resolve to clear and organize three closets that I can barely shut. Perhaps posting a picture on my blog would inspire me to do it.

Or perhaps posting a picture of my lumpy butt on the internet would help me lose 30 or 40 pounds. perhaps.

The baby has started calling his middle brother -- "Doo Doo"
Q has been saying "DooDoo...."350 times a day for weeks now. Recently he switched to "poop" and "pee pee" which is much more hilarious but not as cute as "Doo Doo." Luckily there are bonuses in being a late talker.
The baby is in speech therapy once a week and at least two days of physical therapy. I've also started the baby on fish oil, Omega-3 and DHA supplements. I just give it to all three of them. I tell them it is supposed to make them smarter. The most immediate result has been the improvement in Q's eczema.

Bumpin in the Burbs...

The guy that made this hilarious video lives in the same hood as me. yo.

mERry christmas

I haven't been doing the blog. Life has been getting in my way.
But I am still awake at 2am after an exhausting day.
I'm almost too tired to fully describe the craziness of it all.

I walked into the pediatrician's office with one thing and left with another.

We went in for an ear infection for the oldest and ended up with a day in the ER for the youngest after he ingested a pill he discovered underneath a chair.

There was a little bit left of the pill that the doctors in the office thought it might be a cardiac medicine. It was enough of an unknown that poison control called for an ER for monitoring.
Despite the fact that there was about 3/4 left of the pill, the pharmacy wasn't able to tell what it was. Which I find amazing that we can pore through the DNA of king Tut, but can't figure out what may have poisoned my baby, especially when I walk in with it in my hand.

In the end, he is fine. I will never be fine. That is just the way I roll nowadays. Especially after I have watched the movie The Wiggles Space Dancing five times in a row. I was begging for Dora, Barney, Tinky Winky SOMEONE to rescue me from my wiggly hell.

In my "free time" instead of blogging or even (gasp) watching TV (that is NOT the Wiggles), I've been learning sign language, researching childhood apraxia, finding more treatments for him.

I've gone amazon, crazy, medieval, psycho, in your face mama on this kid. I've gotten him to say his own version of "brrrr" for cold today which was my victory, but I"ll take it.

I am a tired mama, but aren't we all. Would I trade it? Not for a minute, well maybe a minute, or 20 minutes, but then I would come to get it back.

and so it goes....

And so the baby doesn't talk right? He is the silent shouter in my life. That knot in my gut that follows me around and tells me that things just aren't right.
So tonight I have my gut somewhere up in my throat as I roll this diagnosis around in my head..."Childhood Apraxia of Speech."
The speech language pathologist (SLP) came today and gave him a full evaluation. And when she told me this apraxia word my brain froze. She continued....It is treatable with the right intervention....Not a big deal, really. She told me not to Google it, because she has this book, see, and that I should read that book, not the internet. She told me about a crazy hysterical mother that took her toddler to a neurologist in search of what could be wrong with him.
"Not that you would do that. You don't seem the type," she said with a wise wave of her hand.
So I said good-bye, thank you, waved, shut the door and 3,2, 1....Googled....."Childhood Apraxia of.....and there it was. Come on, this lady has known me for, what?, five minutes?
As many of these disorders, diseases, syndromes, conditions... are apt to have there is a dot org. And words like "special needs," "IEPs," "special education," "advocate for your child," "therapy," all stick to my eyelids and prevent any rational thoughts from occuring.
It will be alright. I know it. As Patty our own personal family SLP, talked me down out of my tree tonight, she's a wealth of information. I suppose if God had given me a list of tough things your child must endure, this may be one of the ones I would have chosen, if forced to.

The reveal

OK, People here it is....you've probably been wondering what I've been doing with all my time. I present to you the after. If you haven't seen the before, you'll have to scroll down through the blog (to Sept 7th) to see the work in progress.

three way pull

First tooth yanked by Mama Super Grip.
And baby "sleeps" in the barn with friends.

My oldest boy turned eight on the same day his brother lost his first tooth.

A day of milestones...

The mother of said boys was supposed to be in three places at once. All between 1130 and noon this is what I should have been doing.

1) handing out birthday treats at school

2) attending a Thanksgiving play

3) attending baby's speech therapy

Needless to say, I ended up in breaking all speeding records, frazzled and in tears. And my sweet middle child said matter of factly from the back seat, "too bad, you couldn't see my play."

KC still doesn't talk. And to say I'm worried about it is putting it lightly. I try to work with him and repeat things until I can feel my eyes bulge.

I'm off to do more stuff in the kitchen. I've got the UN coming for dinner.

there's nothing like...

i've been a bit afraid of my blog lately.
I don't know why.
Kind of like picking up the phone to talk to a friend you haven't spoken with for a long time. It seems like there is too much ground to cover.
Oh, I also had two people tell me they don't read my blog anymore because it is too boring.
So I feel it is probably safe to talk about them in unfavorable tones in future posts. I may even post pictures of them.
We've had our first case of pink eye in the house last week. There is nothing like chasing down a two year old, tying him down to pry his eyes apart to splash medicine into his eyes.

Q is going to be in a Thanksgiving play tomorrow. He has a dual role -- The King (as in of England, not Elvis) and Miles Standish. Again....there is nothing like 5 year olds dressed as pilgrims and the natives.

Tomorrow is K's 8th birthday too, which will require the usual fete and festivities.

Shawn is gone to NY for his 103 year old Nana's funeral. He will miss the celebrations here.

I'm also not sure how I will complete the meal preparation for 12 that I have planned on Thursday, but I'm sure it will all work out.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. There is nothing like it.
This is my week to watch Food Network. I can watch people prepare turkey and stuffing all week.

camp

Here is one great element to being the only female in the family. For questions like...."mama, can we camp outside tonight?"

I can simply say, you know I don't deal with such things, ask your Papa. And he will pitch a tent in the backyard and all boys over the age of 5 will prepare for the hardship ahead.

I was awake from 330am to 430am that night with the baby. The outside thermometer read 43 degrees. Papa didn't sleep so well. He tried to convince the two children that maybe they wanted to go in and sleep in the house, but they had none of it.

2nd grade blues

To the best of my knowledge, I've attended second grade.

In fact, I remember the first day my mom said to me. You know, I didn't go to school here (meaning America), I cannot help you any longer with school work, you are on your own.

Well in the end, it was just another great gift she gave me. So while other kids had awesome solar systems crafted out of store bought styrofoam balls and paint or a mechanical structure they built in the garage with their dads. I tried to figure out how to make a dental plate out of flour, water and food color. I won a "superior" and then when I went to the district science fair I found my teeth and literally rotted in the moist baggy with fuzzy mold.

But now I've found myself having to repeat 2nd grade, again. Because we live in a new world where the parents are required to involved in every aspect of the student's class work. K had to decorate a paper gingerbread man to look like himself. He worked at it with great vigor and let's just say the child is not known for his artistic abilities. When I saw all of the little people up on the bulletin board. K's was in the lower left hand corner with a bit of crayon color for clothing and a basic smiley face. Others had buttons, fabric, yarn hair and 3D embellishments showing little gingerdude doing a favorite hobby or sport. Our next project was a book report where we had to, get this, craft a pumpkin or gourd into the main character of the book. Now we are supposed to create a "family turkey" or some damn thing.

Honestly I could hardly fully comprehend the instructions I just glanced at the headline, "Dear Parents...' the dread filled my chest. And then there was something about Thanksgiving being about gratitude for family and golly gee this project will really be a great way for your children be thankful that you got locked away because you won't be around to hurt anyone. anymore.

happy halloween 2007

The kids are asleep in a sugary coma. The baby has determined that Halloween is a great holiday. He rode around in the wagon during trick or treating eating lollipops. He never moved or tried to get out of the moving wagon as he is apt to do. I think he didn't want to break the sneaky sweet snack fest.

I want to be on record here....
I FINALLY picked a green for my bathroom. It really has been worth the hunt. It is restful green "Gentle Dill" by Martin Senour. I feel at peace when I look at it.
I painted the bathroom walls and liked it so much that i decided to make an accent wall at the top of my stairs with it. Of course I ran out. So tomorrow I will find more.

There is only ONE place in town that carries this green color. Of course it was like an Indiana Jones unlocking the crypt adventure for me to finally track down the holy grail of greens.

At this place, there lives a magical woman that people wait hours to consult with on paint colors. People walk in with a swatch of fabric, a chip of paint or an idea in their heads and she walks in front of the spectrum of colors pulling, cutting and pasting until she has a gorgeous collection of coordinating colors.

pictures to follow after I paint trim, ceiling, install new sink base (or someone I'm married to does that)
Fights have erupted if anyone attempts to cut in the line or butt in "can I just ask one question".....